I was just posting in the Members’ “Empowerment Forum” about what I call “WO”moments (Weigh Out; WO) and decided to share this simple and powerful tool here, as well…
A “WO” moment is something I do to help me be more mindful of the choices I make in my life, throughout each day. This tool is particularly important to my recovery because I used to walk around in a constant fog; the numbness fueled by food, food thoughts, and other compulsive behaviors.
“WO” moments are times in my day when I STOP and I Weigh Out my desired outcomes and my current options. “WO” is sort of like saying “whoa” to stop a horse before she goes head first into a wall and hurts herself.
When I have a “WO” moment, I STOP. I step out of autopilot. In my head I ask, [private_membership circle]”What’s my desired outcome here?”
I find “WO” moments help me create that much needed space between stimulus and response (Members, See Empowerment Tool # 20 for more about this).
“Between Stimulus and Response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” Viktor Frankl, Psychiatrist, Holocaust Survivor
I need that space! “WO” gives me that space. Here’s an example. Last night, at midnight, I was making hotel reservations for an upcoming trip. The agent on the phone did not seem to be very experienced and she kept apologizing for a slow computer. She said the AAA discount advertised was not available for the nights I wanted. Huh? I was tired, and impatient, and I could feel myself getting angrier and angrier. I was starting to get rude. Instead, in my head, I stepped back and said, “WO, Ellen. My desired outcome is to get a hotel reservation on the books and then to explore my options for a better rate.”
I took a deep breath and I nicely asked her if there was anything more I could do to get a better rate. She said she was “off site” and could not offer any discounts but that I could call the hotel on Monday. They might be able to help. The call ended well, with both a reservation and an option to explore on Monday. When I hung up I was relatively calm. I did not have to head to the kitchen to stuff my anger nor any shame for being bitchy to the person on the other end of the phone. “WO” helps me regulate emotions over which I used to binge. Last night “WO” helped me go to bed without feeling all stirred up. I slept quite well. “WO” works!
In my early recovery days, I used to visualize a Stop Sign in my head. One of my coaching clients uses the screeching sound of a record coming to an abrupt stop. Use whatever works for you. For me, it’s “WO”! It’s quick and it stops me right in my tracks. It gets me connectd to me, in the moment! If I am conscious, I have a much better chance of creating the life I say I want.
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Ellen Shuman is a Life Coach who specializes in emotional and binge eating issues. She is the founder of A Weigh Out & Acoria Eating Disorder Treatment, Vice President of the Binge Eating Disorder Association (BEDA), and Co-Chair of the Academy for Eating Disorders Special Interest Group on “Health at Every Size”, ellen@aweighout.com [/private_membership circle]
