The other day, as I was swiping my credit card at the Costco checkout line, I was surprised to hear a man’s voice say, “Hi, Ellen”. It was a very nice man I’ve known for 25 years. He works for the computer company that has sold me and serviced every business and personal computer I have owned since 1989.
It had been about 18 months since I’d seen him (no computer crashes in that time). The last time I’d seen him he was on crutches and clearly in pain. I asked how his knee was doing. He shared that he had had a successful knee replacement. Good for him, I said.
As he walked me out of Costco and into the parking lot, he volunteered how pleased he was with his 30 pound weight loss in prep for the surgery. Then, he told me how proud his wife was of him for losing the weight. Then, he went on to say how thrilled his doctor was that he had shed 30 pounds. And then, we said goodbye and headed to our cars.
I was so struck by how proud he was of his weight loss.
On my drive home, I found myself thinking, what else might he be proud of in his life. In the few minutes we had together, I would have loved to have heard about some interesting or selfless act he had done for a neighbor or friend. I would have loved to have heard that since his surgery he’d been walking homeless dogs at a local shelter, or about a wonderful trip he and his wife had taken to a new city, or country, or to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum…
What is it about sticking to a diet, weight loss, being or getting thin that makes people feel so proud… or so ashamed, when the outcome is not what they hoped? Is that really what we covet most in life? Is that the most important goal we could possibly achieve?
What do you think? Have you ever missed out on more enlivening, enriching, enlightening, enjoyable life pursuits or activities because all you could think about was how much you weighed?
Ellen Shuman is an Emotional Eating Coach who specializes in helping people overcome compulsive eating, binge eating disorder, and food addiction. She is continuously amazed and saddened by how much time people spend obsessing about weight; their own and others! She is the founder of A Weigh Out & Acoria Binge Eating Disorder Treatment (1993-present), Past President of the Binge Eating Disorder Association (2011/2012), and Co-Founder of the Academy for Eating Disorders Special Interest Group on “Health at Every Size”, Contact Ellen, firstname.lastname@example.org, or 513-321-4242.