“Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor.” ~Anne Lamott
“Have no fear of perfection—you’ll never reach it.” ~Salvador Dalí
A search for perfection is always a search for fault. And once we find the inevitable faults, perfectionism sets up the expectation that all faults can and should be eliminated. Inescapably, our scrutiny will reveal that how we are, how we look, and how we perform is not good enough, is not perfect.
It’s easy to see why diets, with their rules of how to behave and promises of getting the body and life you want, are so seductive. Diets prompt us to focus on a perfect, idealized end result instead of focusing on and valuing the process of self care that creates true change.
In focusing on a perfect end result, we move away from knowing and trusting that, no matter what, [private_membership circle]we have “basic goodness.” We move away from knowing that, instead of turning our power over to a rigid vision of how we should achieve some goal (the rules of the diet, for example), we can trust our body and our soul’s preferences to be reliable guiding compasses. In tuning into ourselves versus who or how we think we should be, we will find a natural fueling of our energy for moving forward.
It is helpful to consider nature as the model when we find ourselves judging how we look or how we perform. Is the sky the “wrong” color of blue? Is the porcupine imperfect because he doesn’t have soft kitten fur? Is the manatee any less graceful and healthy than the greyhound? Is the squirrel that collects only 14 acorns instead of 22 today a failure? Is the turtle’s walking pace not fast enough next to the hare’s sprint?
When we begin to embrace the natural imperfection in the world around us and in ourselves, we can begin to let go of perfectionism and experience the simplicity, comfort, and movement of “good enough.” Instead of feeling negative and depleted as a result of focusing on what went poorly, we experience energizing pleasure and satisfaction as we focus on what is going well.
To shift from seeking perfection to seeing the “good enough” in how we are and all we do enables us to develop a positive, relaxed attitude toward life—one that will ironically bring us closer to the original intent of our perfectionism: doing things well and feeling good about it!
Affirming Statement: “Embracing good enough in myself, I move forward.”
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Nutrition therapists Amy Tuttle, RD, LCSW and Karin Kratina, RD, PhD provide no-diet articles and resources including “Stay Attuned: The E-zine for Nourishing Connections” at their Nourishing Connections website. www.nourishingconnections.com[/private_membership circle]
