I was walking to my theater seat this past Sunday when I heard someone call my name. It was an old friend whom I had dropped like a hot potato about nine years ago. She had been a good friend for eleven years prior; someone I had cared about a great deal…someone who I believed cared about me, as well.
But I was in a bad space nine years ago; feeling particularly emotionally vulnerable. On two occasions in a row I had dinner with this person and left feeling hurt by something she’d said. All these years later, I still remember details of those perceived slights (funny how we don’t tend to remember all the good stuff that’s said to us ).
Thinking back to her comments now, I know I distorted what happened to fit how insecurely I was feeling at the time. Her comments were not really that big of a deal. But back then, whenever I felt hurt, rather than acknowledge my feelings and using my voice, I would simply push “the invisible button” and eliminate from my life anyone I thought had slighted me.
I learned this behavior as a child. Feelings were NEVER processed in my family. Conflict often lead to the end of relationships.
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