Back when I was using my relationship with food for everything– for entertainment, for comfort, disconnection, self-soothing, often just for something to do to keep me from thinking or feeling; to keep me from being present, I had an epiphany. My life had become very small.
I did very little other than work…and think about what I could get to eat on the way home. Weekends, when I didn’t have to work, were filled with DVD’s from Blockbuster–picked up Friday nights on the way home, along with lots of ice cream, m&ms, diet coke, donuts, etc.
I had started reorganizing my days to accommodate eating alone. I turned down invitations so I COULD be home eating alone. I stopped connecting with friends, except in a superficial way. I stopped planning trips. Actually, I stopped planning adventures of any kind. I went to fewer and fewer movies in movie theaters (this was long before Netflix), or plays, or concerts. I no longer paid attention to what exhibits might be coming to museums in my city. I stopped planning walks, bike rides, or white water rafting trips with friends.
All of my creative energy went into making food plans. Which restaurants delivered? Which ones had drive-throughs? My only adventures were to be found in food. I was miserable! My biggest challenge…how could I NOT think and feel while I waited 30 minutes for the pizza delivery guy to arrive?
Now I know these behaviors were all symptoms of a full-blown binge eating disorder…
Does any of that sound familiar? If it feels like your relationship with food has taken on a life of its own, you’re certainly not alone. And you deserve help! (If you’d like to hear more about what I wrote about above, please consider listening to a recording I just posted; a TeleSeminar with Psychotherapist Trisha Rubin, “Do We Turn to Food Because We Lack Adventure?”. It’s all about how common this is and what we each can do to get our lives back. Anyone can listen for free–just take advantage of a 21 Day Free Trial I offer to visitors.)
How small has your world become? I promise you, it does NOT have to stay that way!
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I’m Ellen Shuman and I have been through it all, personally and professionally! For the past couple of decades, I have been a Coach who specializes in helping people overcome emotional eating, compulsive eating, binge eating disorder, and food addiction. I founded A Weigh Out & Acoria Binge Eating Disorder Treatment (1993-present). I am also a Past President of the Binge Eating Disorder Association (2011/2012), and one of its founding board members. Questions about phone coaching? Feel free to contact me, ellen@aweighout.com, 513-321-4242.